when you've said the wrong thing

The fun thing about communication is that as long as you are in a conscious state of mind, you’re 100% in control of what you say. But sometimes you say the wrong things anyways.

Here’s trial attorney Jefferson Fisher’s explanation of what to do when want to fix it, but you're not sure what to say.

#1. Acknowledge how it came across to them.

Begin with "I can see how that came across confusing" or "I can see how that came across hurtful."

If you want them to listen to you, validate their perception first.

#2. Follow it up with this exact phrase: "That was not my intention."

People are much more forgiving when your intention was good and you said the wrong thing versus when your intent was bad.

#3. Ask for a redo.

Say, "I'd like to try again" or "I'd like to start over."

When they say "okay," deliver on that promise. 
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This shows that you're someone who can learn from their mistakes and invest in communication rather than conflict.

And that's how to fix it when you said the wrong thing.

Jefferson adds, Saying the wrong thing doesn’t define you. How you handle it does.

Have a great weekend,
Orly

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