Planting seeds through voicemail

I had a friend who was going through a hard time.

Life had dealt him a rough hand—a broken home, opioid addiction, homelessness—all before he graduated high school.

He maintained an upbeat attitude and never spoke about his past, but the experience shaped him to be distrustful of others and others to be distrustful of him.

He once told me, “You’re my friend, I’d never stab you in the back.”

Followed by, “I’d stab you in the front.”

Our lives went separate ways from high school, and I heard he’d developed cancer sometime after college. I decided to give him a call and leave a voice mail:

“Hey man, thinking about you. No need to call me back. I’ll call again next month.”

I’d continue calling for about 18 months, on long drives, and he would pick up once in while and we’d catch up.

Most months, it was just the voicemail with no call back.

But one month he picked up and told me how much the messages mattered. He was going through a hard time, was overwhelmed with life, and deeply appreciated knowing that someone was thinking of him, with no pressure to call back.

He said telling him that I would call again later meant the most.

All in all, I spent about 20 minutes leaving voicemails over the course of those years I called. To give someone who needs some love a bit of peace, I encourage you to do the same.