- The Better Listener
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- how to hope more
Every week I spend four hours with a catalogue of teens going through some of the worst situations I can imagine.
I’m brought in to give them hope.
I do that by helping them transform their challenging environments into helpful ones by creating powerful sentences that the kids can use to plant seeds for miracles to happen. Here are three of them:
“Neurosurgeon” A simple reminder of the goals. When this person is struggling with their focus and their anger issues, this is the word that snaps them back into remembering they are here to grow, and that they can’t be distracted by the little disturbances around them.
“I would like some empathy.” A challenging ask, but a meaningful one. The person who uses this sentence feels largely misunderstood. They have a calm demeanor, which results in people never taking them seriously. By asking for empathy, they’re able to gently request something that’s more than just attention, but interest.
The problem here is that a lot of people don’t know how to give empathy, so they have a step by step simple process we’ve built out to get them to explain.
Ask questions to guess how they’re feeling.
Clarity answers with sentences like, “So you’re saying…”
Be patient.
“Please help me meditate twice a day” A specific request. Challenging to ask, but providing the framework and structure for a meaningful growth strategy.
If you’re like me, you thrive when other people keep you accountable. Identifying people who can support you seems simple, but asking something specific from them is hard.
Do you have any powerful phrases that have changed your life? Whether a single ask, or a recurring sentiment - I’d love to know.
Thanks for listening,
O
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