- The Better Listener
- Posts
- A young boy's parents are divorcing
A kid came up to my listening table and said his parents are getting divorced.
Here's what most people do wrong in moments like this:
❌ Justify - "Everything happens for a reason"
❌ Minimize - "At least you have two Christmases now"
❌ Make it about you - "My parents got divorced and I turned out fine"
Stop. Just stop.
When someone's struggling, your job isn't to be their life coach. It's to be their witness.
Here's what actually works:
"That must feel really scary."
You're naming their emotion. Not fixing it. Not minimizing it. Just seeing it.
"Tell me what that's like for you."
You're creating space. You're saying "your experience matters to me."
"I'm here with you right now."
You're offering presence. Not solutions. Presence.
And if you doubt the power of your presence, just remember all the times you were struggling with something and all you wanted was someone to talk to about it.
You can't control their situation or how they feel about it, but you can control whether or not they feel alone.
The most powerful thing you can give someone isn't your advice.
It's your attention.
P.S. - Forward this to someone who needs to hear it. We all know that person who thinks every conversation needs a solution.
Daily News for Curious Minds
Be the smartest person in the room by reading 1440! Dive into 1440, where 4 million Americans find their daily, fact-based news fix. We navigate through 100+ sources to deliver a comprehensive roundup from every corner of the internet – politics, global events, business, and culture, all in a quick, 5-minute newsletter. It's completely free and devoid of bias or political influence, ensuring you get the facts straight. Subscribe to 1440 today.
Forwarded this email? Click here to sign up for the Better Listener.